The grief we don’t get to talk about at work

Right now, there are employees in your business who are having to carry something incredibly heavy and this time it’s not the death of a loved one, but because they're watching someone they love slowly disappear. This is anticipatory grief, and we often don’t even realise our employees are coping with this as it just isn’t talked about enough.

Anticipatory grief begins before the physical loss happens, so for your employees who are caring for someone living with dementia, this can mean living in a constant state of grief. Trying to cope with who the person their loved one used to be, while still caring for the person that they are today and often this can be quite, quite different.

So many uncertain and sleepless nights, with new roles to undertake, and a future that feels unstable and worrying.

Your employees may be trying to cope with;

• Caring responsibilities alongside their normal working day

• Disrupted sleep and exhaustion

• Significant emotional stress

• Changing roles within the family

• Ongoing grief that just continues

  
  

And because there has not been an actual loss this often goes unseen. Your people keep showing up and working, they keep delivering what they need to and keep managing, but underneath it all they may simply be running on empty.

Have you noticed them being more fatigued than usual or perhaps struggling to concentrate or are they becoming a little quieter? It’s these changes in our people that we need to look out for, which is why we need to know our people well so that we can notice when something feels different.

Trust your intuition, and if you think someone may be struggling in your team, reach out to them, give them space to talk about their grief* with you and let them know how you can be there for them.

That might look like:

• Flexibility - small adjustments that ease life a little

• Understanding - a manager who notices and creates the space to talk – so important

• Conversation - helping acknowledge what someone is going through with empathy

• Recognition - that grief support isn't only relevant with a bereavement

  
  

So, does your organisation know how to approach your people who are grieving right now?

If supporting employees through anticipatory grief is something your organisation could start exploring, I'd love to have a conversation with you. Just email me, and we’ll chat.